I thought, I hoped and secretly prayed the day we introduced solid foods to him at 6 months, THINGS would be different: I would get more than 2 hours of uninterrupted sleep - I would have a chance to finally finish my thank you cards from my baby shower - I could maintain order in the house - I could call some friends - I could squeeze a yoga workout in - I could WRITE and submit stuff to be published like I was doing while I was pregnant - I could wash my hair.....oh the dreams kept piling and my expectations of the moment solids first hit the lining of his bottomless pit kept growing...until the moment came and.....
...nothing happened....
Well, not immediately anyway. You may have noticed that I am indeed writing right now (dishes undone and, uhm, some other stuff). I've even gotten the chance to make some pressing phone calls and still he sleeps. It's been over an hour. I have to pinch myself.
Every once in a while I do get the gift of time. It didn't happen right away but sometimes now I get an hour or (gulp) two! to spend any way i wish.
(definitely when I'm not teething that is: LOOK-my first two teeth!)
Don't get me wrong, please, I love being Kaleb's mother. LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT. I always dreamed that no matter how high-powered my career would be (which ended up more on the caring side instead of the high-powered one), I would spend the earliest, most formative years of my kids' lives molding their silly-putty little brains into the musical, mathematical, analytical, eloquent and charming geniuses they would become. The world needs some heroes and I was determined to produce them.
Now, though - I'm thinking - maybe....that's a little too much pressure to put on a 7-month old child. Maybe we could just just start by going to our developmental playgroup and making some art.
We could do experiments in crazy outfits.
We could wear beads and philosophize about life.
We could even make beautiful music together.
Maybe it'll be enough that my son is a good, happy person that cares about others. Maybe that'll be enough to make him a hero to somebody and it doesn't have to be to everybody. I mean - if a person like Obama can't be a hero to everybody - an open-minded, intellectual risen from the depths of food stamps and a racist society - it just shows there are too many everybodys to satisfy them all.And speaking of Obama - during the Democratic Convention they aired a documentary that talked about Obama's mama - an outside the home worker - and how she used to get up at 4 in the morning with him to go over his studies.
4 in the morning.
I guess she wasn't breastfeeding every two hours but still! I had to dig myself out from under this particular inferiority complex by realizing that I'm doing the best I can - Kaleb and I go to school three days a week. He has his little backpack with all his "learning tools" - maracas, bells, streamers, spiders on a stick - you know, the usual.
Sometimes, we'll even do homework.
We read, we sing songs, we do tummy time but now it looks more like table time since he is preparing to crawl.
I do more stuff for him than anyone else in my life and I was gratified to hear, from actually my mother - who loves him like crazy and has plenty of baby experience - that he wasn't an easy baby. Really? How could I know? I don't have anyone to compare him to.
I was going to throw in another slideshow of "firsts" but I don't want to overwhelm anyone with cuteness so be on the lookout for another blog soon (nap willing, that is!)
10 comments:
Life looks amazing! mazeltov!
Very cute
You know I'm your fan........and my grandson is the greatest..........
Love you guys...........
Babushka
Well it's about time you've pposted a new entry!! What a doll! That class sounds like so much fun! I love the pic of him painting...the messier they are, the better the day, that's my motto! I'm sorry you've not been sleeping too much yet...yikes! Hopefully soon...How do you still look so good on so little sleep, though? No fair.
Yahoo, what a cutie patutie! I love your blog you are so, well, on it! I can't wait to see the two of you. It feels like forever, what 2 weeks now? HA HA HA
Thanks for sharing, I love the photos and videos!
Jessie & Zoey
Very, very cute! Kaleb will really treasure this when he grows up. Can't wait for the next episode of the Kaleb Chronicles :-)
Hugs
Yazmin
He is soo cute love the pictures. You are a great writer!
I love the pics of Caleb in art class. I've been wanting to play around with art and Cyrus but I thought he was too young. You and Caleb have inspired me! I'm going to put him down on floor with some paper and crayons and see what happens.
The secret for Cyrus sleeping through the night was adding a little rice cereal (maybe a tablespoon) to his last bottle at 7pm. You can try it if you pump and give him a bottle. Some moms I know also suggested warming the cereal a little (b/c that makes it less grainy) and also adding banana baby food. That realy sticks with him and he generally slept until 5 OR 6. He's started waking again at 3AM and I think it's because he's ready for protein. The doctor said it's time and my mommy friends say that also makes babies feel full. I just started giving him a little turkey so I'll let you know what happens! Good luck with Caleb (who is soo cut by the way!).
Carol
Alas, I have no secrets to share with you Rina, but I will tell you that your writing is beautiful and inspiring. Kaleb is so engaged and interested in the things you introduce him to! I sincerely hope that you will not only keep these blogs for Kaleb, but maybe use them to submit at some point for a handbook for new mothers! ;-) I know that if I ever get there I will need all of the help in the world to believe that I'm still normal. Love you. Give your son a kiss from me.
I am so glad you are having fun. It is the most under rated, under appreciated (by some)and definitely under paid! So why do we do it??
Each day usually has the answer!
Sleep through the night. HA! My sister's daughter is 2 1/2 and "won't seem to stay on a schedule".
The neatest part I am starting to appreciate, is that though I had huge goals from the time they left me, they teach us about ourselves and that they are unique. It is cool to watch them become their own "people".
Loved seeing the photos!
Melissa Ahlstrom
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